Cheese on toast catastrophe – message to the World…..and to Cheese

How can anyone get cheese on toast wrong, it’s got to be the most simple thing in the world to make, right?

Well, the other day, I was really looking forward to some cheese on toast! Let it be known that I love cheese more than life itself; the thought of eating cheese on toast actually makes me dribble a little bit; anyway…I made, what can only be described as, the worst choice EVER, by trying to counteract my cheesy naughtiness with………….granary bread! I know, what was I thinking?! It was the worst cheese on toast I’ve ever had in my entire life. 

I felt completely deflated and downright miserable, (I might have even cried a bit) not to mention really guilty about the fact the cheese was probably pretty excited at being taken out of the fridge to lie on a slice of thick white bread; if Cheese had hands it would have been rubbing them with glee and slapping on the Worcester sauce whilst humming a chirpy tune before lying under the heat of the grill….imagine it’s dismay on seeing the granary (WTF?) I can almost hear the scratchy sound of a needle being dragged across a record ruining Cheese’s happy thoughts. Poor Cheese. 

I am not dissing granary bread as a stand alone product I might add, I’m not a bully I wouldn’t exclude anyone/thing like that, I like marmite on granary toast and prawn Mayo sandwiches on granary – it has its uses. Cheese on toast is not one of them though.

To Cheese: I am so sorry! Please forgive me. I promise NEVER to do it again. I love you.

To People: do not try this at home.

No-ones feelings were hurt in the making of this blog post.

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